can’t think of a title

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isn’t it weird how pain clarifies so much in life? i mean seriously. you figure out what’s important in life real fast. that’s kind of why i’ve been missing from the blogosphere the past couple of weeks. ear pain. mayjah!

and it’s weird. a lot of “grown-ups” can’t handle pain. i for one have a high pain tolerance so my dad was a little freaked out last wednesday when he saw me. i was writhing from intense, sharp ear pain. turns out my ear drum burst which created a hole that had to be repaired in day-surgery the next day. i also got ear tubes which is kind of like a shunt for one’s ear drums. the doctor said i had an extremely high pain tolerance and should have come in much sooner. he called me “one tough cookie” which made me sort of get a little surge of pride. :)

the day before though i was willing to give up anything to make the pain go away. i was bargaining with god. i’ll give up acting. i’ll be content without the career i’ve always imagined. blah blah blah. and i meant it, in that moment. as soon as the pain subsided, no way. but somehow when it felt like a knife was gouging out my ears.

grey’s anatomy all deals nicely with emotional pain–especially recently. 5×21 has been my favorite episode in a long time–one aspect dealing with izzie’s mother. the fact that izzie, who is dying of cancer, has to protect her mother from her diagnosis and parent her elder who simply “cannot bear” the truth.

pain has a magical way of separating the players from the peons. what do you think?

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